Love Kernels, A.K.A. Things I’d Share With 20 Year Old Me

March 12, 2017

Okay…I know I’ve mentioned this twice already…but I cannot stress enough how much I love Crazy Ex-Girlfriend and how you should be watching.

I’m just getting into Season 2, because I’m behind (and I hate myself for it), but it’s still amazing, as far as I can see.

I’m into the fourth episode of the second season but I’m still thinking of Episode 1 because the musical numbers are fucking GOLD.

Not only can I not stop singing this song, but I’m beginning to wish this show had been around for my twenty something year old self. If I had a dollar for every love kernel my friends and I stockpiled in our twenties, I would’ve retired at 30.

It’s crazy how we took some small, insignificant sound bite from a conversation with our men of the hour, and twisted it to make ourselves believe that these guys were worth additional effort. We did this often, and without fail.

Bless this show and bless Rachel Bloom for showcasing this kind of thing that is so relatable.

This show is so good, guys 🙊


Love at first sight / slash / lust at first sight?

February 16, 2017

I hear about “magical” meetings all the time, where people know right away that someone is their “soulmate” or similar.

This is an honest-to-goodness question from me to you: am I just jaded?

Because I do not posess the emotional gear to believe in this shit. Maybe it’s due in part to my personal past, but if a guy told me I was his forever within a week after meeting me, he’d basically see a cloud of dust, and I’d long have disappeared into the witness protection program. I really can’t subscribe to this kind of fantasy. Even if he was right, and we did end up madly in love 30 years out, I’d rather he keep those cards close to his chest for at least….well, longer than a week. I have had enough long term relationships to know that shit comes to light fast and often over the first several years. Even more after you live together.

I would have some serious cross-examination questions for those who have been “happily” married for decades after such a hasty beginning. Because something tells me their “happily ever after” doesn’t mirror mine.

Goodnight from my cynical self 😏

I just had a hilarious-slash-horrifying thought

February 11, 2017

(Disclaimer: opinions are my own; some hyperbole involved in terms of stats)

Thanks to pop culture and all the bullshit we’ve been fed, about 99% of women have faked an orgasm at some point or another, if not regularly. Some more often than others, sadly. We’ve been socialized to accept that our orgasms are unicorns and so we should take what we can get, which is usually not a whole lot of anything impressive, if we heed that terrible advice. Along the same vein, about 99% of men think they know how to satisfy a   woman because most of the women they try to satisfy are faking it.