The most horrific sight greeted me when I scanned the news online the other day.
Honestly, I always say that the gods love to toy with me, that they are sitting around eating popcorn as they watch my life play out. I imagine that, as they’ve watched me struggle to move past my writer’s hang-ups, striving for excellence in every literary project I undertake, they’ve been cooking up this latest twist of fate: Snooki’s “novel”, A Shore Thing, has made the New York Times Bestseller List.
Can’t you just picture it?
God #1: Isn’t that sweet? Precious is writing more and more often.
God #2: Yeah, she’s showing so much hope and optimism.
God #3: BOR-ING. You know what would be funny?
Gods #1 and 2: We’re all ears. Whatcha got?
God #3: What if a drunken gnome with no talent whatsoever were to make it onto a well-regarded list for literary types? Would Precious not completely lose her shit?
All gods in unison: Brilliant.
I swear, they are trying to kill me. Read the rest of this entry »