Existential Crisis Part Trois

March 16, 2017

No one is more shocked by my current optimism than I.

A couple of days ago, I was aimless and anxious.

Today, I still have zero clue what fucking direction I am going to steer my life in. But I feel pretty amazing.

Honestly, putting into the universe the idea that I was struggling to figure out my life has been great. I’ve already come up with activities I can do to improve my state of mind (E.G. Hike to the waterfront. Run stairs. Spend time next to sun-exposed window with eyes closed. Etc.) Plus I have so many notes going for my writing projects. I just love that small adjustments lead to big results, eventually. Hard not to feel optimistic. 💕

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Existential Crisis Continued

March 15, 2017

After yesterday’s post, I seem to have spiralled down into an abyss of both self-doubt and dreamy optimism. Yes, that abyss is basically an oxymoron.

I really do feel lost right now, but at the same time, I feel like so many options are available, if only I can harness my motivation and drive.


I’m bordering on having an existential crisis

March 14, 2017

Have you ever been consumed by a sense that you should be somewhere else, or doing something else…or both? My mind has been buzzing lately. I feel fairly certain that my life needs a significant shake-up, but I can’t seem to settle my racing thoughts long enough to formulate any ideas. Actually, that’s not quite true. I can think of many things I’d love to try…things like relocating to somewhere completely new, changing careers, exploring outlandish lifestyle options that would take me out of the rat race….but I can’t begin to figure out how to even start. All I can think about are all the obstacles. Do I just throw a dart at a vision board, pick something, and work towards it? I wish I could just teleport to a terrace in Barcelona and transform my life accordingly. Of course, instantaneous change is a pipe dream. There is usually no quick fix. I believe that a dream scenario in itself is indeed attainable, and the path to such a scenario can be exhilarating. I just can’t calm down long enough to chart the path.

How do I quiet my inner chatter and focus? God, I need to go visit a shrink.


Love Kernels, A.K.A. Things I’d Share With 20 Year Old Me

March 12, 2017

Okay…I know I’ve mentioned this twice already…but I cannot stress enough how much I love Crazy Ex-Girlfriend and how you should be watching.

I’m just getting into Season 2, because I’m behind (and I hate myself for it), but it’s still amazing, as far as I can see.

I’m into the fourth episode of the second season but I’m still thinking of Episode 1 because the musical numbers are fucking GOLD.

Not only can I not stop singing this song, but I’m beginning to wish this show had been around for my twenty something year old self. If I had a dollar for every love kernel my friends and I stockpiled in our twenties, I would’ve retired at 30.

It’s crazy how we took some small, insignificant sound bite from a conversation with our men of the hour, and twisted it to make ourselves believe that these guys were worth additional effort. We did this often, and without fail.

Bless this show and bless Rachel Bloom for showcasing this kind of thing that is so relatable.

This show is so good, guys 🙊


Underground vs Mainstream Music

March 11, 2017

Okay, so I love me some mainstream music. I will never be so pretentious as to judge others for their personal taste in music.

(There are enough trash types who do this all on their own.)

While I do love a bunch of popular stuff, when it comes down to the nitty gritty, I tend towards some lesser known musical artists, most notably electronica and the like.

On one hand, I want my faves to have all the success they deserve, and to get the compensation associated with success. On the other, I get this bizarre feeling of satisfaction knowing that my faves are still underground and it feels a bit like I have a secret, when I hear one of the songs only I know, at a public venue.

How do people who have no musical inclination whatsoever (I heard this one nut job say he doesn’t like music) wake up in the morning? If you don’t care  about music, what is there to live for? 😏

No, seriously, I’m asking.

 


Thought of the Day

March 9, 2017

Beware of people who make sure they are featured as the victim in all of their stories.

In my experience, people who only tell stories that paint them as the wronged party, generally hold a skewed life view. It’s not usually fair or accurate.

Also, people who speak ill of ALL of their “friends” are guaranteed to speak ill of you, too. I have a few personal examples – and those people are no longer on my friend roster. ✌🏼


Cheers to women, and to the people who love and respect them

March 8, 2017

My wish for this International Women’s Day is for at least a few men and women (who don’t get it yet) to be awakened to the idea that being a feminist does not equal man-hating, or extremism, or hypersensitivity. It takes time and education to get there. I personally learned so much about things I didn’t realize I needed to learn, as recently as 5-6 years ago. It’s okay not to be completely enlightened, as long as you realize it’s never too late to open your heart and mind. All love! ❤️