One of my personal policies is to not bring mutual friends into a conflict or issue I ever have with another pal.
I am starting to feel like I’ve basically set myself up to allow toxic people to trample over me.
It’s pretty much a given, in the long term, that I lose friends who were mutually connected to a toxic person I cut ties with.
I am eternally blessed/cursed with the ability to see through people’s bullshit long before others do. We’re talking years and YEARS beforehand.
My personal ethics are such that I refuse to trash talk anyone to a mutual contact for personal gain. Most toxic types have no such policy, so I quickly catch wind that I’ve been not only talked about, but slandered too.
I think my main reason for letting the mutual friends go is that if it’s so easy for them to accept and believe outlandish crap fed to them by the toxic friend – without even approaching me or investigating for themselves – they were never really worth my friendship to begin with, were they? This reality has dealt me some horrible blows, but it’s honestly the general rule.
As far as I’m concerned, if the price of dropping a toxic person means dropping people who choose to buy into the toxic person’s narrative, then it’s a price well worth paying for my sanity and overall well-being.
Brutal but true. Good luck to you if you’ve chosen to pander to a toxic bitch, because it won’t end well. Cheers! 🍷😒